Wednesday, October 23, 2019

Race Recap: Ironman Mont Tremblant - MAGIC

i love and hate double ironman years.  i love the challenge, i love the training and i love the puzzle that is an ironman race.  but sometimes... i hate the challenge, i hate the training, and i hate that ironman IS a puzzle and a balance board and that so many things have go right to have a good, if not great, day.  IM Ireland was crazy.  it was a lesson in survival and mental toughness - it wasn't a typical IM day.  but then... is there a typical IM day?

in my world, Mont Tremblant is a magical place.  i had an amazing IM day there four years ago - it was my first IM podium and first realization that kona could one day be a possibility.  it was an incredible day racing with friends and developing those friendships and being grateful for where the sport had taken my life at that point.  in the weeks, months, and years later - whenever i looked back at that weekend, it was always a happy, shiny memory and i always wondered if my brain was just manufacturing those memories into something bigger and better than they actually were.  

when i met Brian at the end of 2017 (can you believe that?!) and learned that he had signed up for IMMT, i was so excited for him and it seemed like fate.  as race day grew near and i decided to sherpa his race, i was looking forward to seeing if he would enjoy it as much as i had.  and he really did - he loved the town, he loved the race and i got to see it from a different point of view as a spectator.  i got to train on those roads in the days leading up to the race and in the days following the race (that long run following a spectated IM day is not easy!).  and i found that it was still a magical place.  

not long after we left canada last year, we decided that we wanted to return to do the race together the following year.  i had already signed up for ireland and IMMT was scheduled for 7 weeks later.  it was a few weeks closer together than i would have liked, but i couldn't pass up this opportunity to do two epic races in the span of two months.  id done it before - and id done pretty well in the 2nd race in years prior, so i threw myself back into training after i returned home from ireland.  my coach wasn't super thrilled (chattanooga was actually a smarter option) but he was supportive and encouraging nonetheless.

for the first time since i'd started triathlon, i was finally developing confidence in the bike.  i always told myself i wasn't a strong cyclist - look at who my friends are! its hard not to compare yourself - but this year, i was getting stronger and faster and having that confidence and belief in myself was making a world of difference in training.  ireland hadn't been a great representation of what i felt i was capable of and i was eager to throw down on a course that i had ridden before. 

fast forward weeks - it was finally time for another road trip to canada.  we did our usual - listened to music, listened to MURDER podcasts, ate road trip snacks, stopped at starbucks 15 times, and before we knew it (13 hours later) we were pulling into the airBNB - the same building we'd stayed in the year prior.

Tacos in Saratoga Springs

we immediately got dressed for a shakeout run and the sun had set by the time we headed out.  i wasn't feeling great - my heartrate was up, the hills were taxing, and i felt exhausted.  BLEH.  we headed out to casey's for a quick dinner and went to bed way too late, but DAMN, it was a really nice mattress and i slept like the dead.  

view of lake from shake out run (right out of transition on run course)


friday morning, we got up to go swim and i was looking forward to the COFFEE BOAT.  swimming felt fine and i did about 30 minutes - the water temp was beautiful in the low 70s and the ironman vibe was growing strong.  we met LL and Finn for coffee and crepe breakfasts and caught up on life.  bri and i headed to check-in and got to bypass the loooooong time thanks to AWA status.  check-in was done in 10 minutes and we headed to the IM merchandise tent to pick up our backpacks (meh) and spend money.  i only ended up with a new pair of goggles so i actually think thats the best i've ever done in the IM tent.

view from our balcony


COFFEE BOAT SWIM

then... MORE COFFEE

i'm not sure what to do with babies, especially when they are eating blue shaved ice

it was time for bike riding, so we got our lives together and after starting/stopping a few times to get various technologies, brakes, and saddles adjusted, we finally headed out.  we went straight to duplessis to ride the hill - and to my delight, it was not as bad as i remembered it.  about half way up, we saw a couple of dudes outside their car cheering for us.  i was so excited - i told you this was a magical place! - that complete strangers were out days before the race just to cheer on cyclists riding the hill!  turns out - it was mike teske and alan, iowan love shacker extraordinairres and i was thrilled to see them.  lets recall that teske was a major factor in me signing up for my first ironman in 2014.  we would get to share another IM experience together!  we exchanged hugs and laughs for a few minutes and bri and i left to finish our ride.  

ready to roll thanks to Liz B for the hot wheels


we ventured to the little town of tremblant (the non-ski resort area) and it was adorable!  we had a delicious charcuterie board and pizza and cokes and left full and happy.  the rest of the night passed uneventfully as we ate dinner and binged on Mindhunter season 2 (amaaaaaaazing).  we also attempted numerous times to learn the "Git up song" line dance and listened to Ed Sheeran's colab album on repeat.  i don't wanna brag but.. we're super cool. 

YUM

saturday morning involved packing transition bags, more Git up song, double and triple checking transition bags, more Ed Sheeran, and bike check-in.  we watched more Mindhunter (seriously, so good) and dined on pesto chicken pasta before heading to bed.  And maybe more Ed Sheeran.  Defnitely more Git up song.  i think we were both in a good mindset, pretty relaxed, and looking forward to the day ahead.  plus, that mattress was amazing and perfect for binging TV shows and normatec boots. 

standard pre-race rack shot

RACE MORNINIG! 
we woke up, had leftover coffee from the day before, and dined on Picky Bar Oatmeal (apple, if you're curious).  we loaded up the car with our stuff and drove to the bottom of the hill to leave the car so that we could avoid the steep uphill with our bikes many, many hours later following the race.  #protip

in transition, i struggled a bit with the pump and had to take it to the mechanic to inflate the tires.  this was an improvement from 4 years prior when i arrived to my brakes dangling from my bars and the mechanic having to do a quick repair... this was a low stress morning compared to that!  i loaded up my nutrition, checked to make sure i was in a reasonable gear and eyed the pro racks like a creep.  lionel sanders was pumping his tires and cody beals was attending to something on his bike.  the stars... they're just like us!  i didn't see sarah true, but i was giddy just seeing her bike.

im a loser.  

we headed to swim start and positioned ourselves in the spot we had last year, a stoop right outside the beachbar area.  wetsuits on, i downed a redbull i'd picked up along the way - YUM - and we headed to the water after throwing our morning clothes bag into the dump truck.  the male pros were lined up under the arch and we had front row, swim-side seats to their start.  we watched the pro men start their day and a familar pang started to rise in my chest - that panicky, chest-tightening feeling without the crippling anxiety - its the perfect state of mind in the minutes before the swim start. 

view from the stoop, putting wetsuits on

bri and i waved to teske and alan and wished them both a safe and fun day.  the pro women were now lined up at the start and brian pointed out sarah true.  i watched her for a few seconds and that panicky feeling went away.  then...

i cried.  

wait, what?

why am i SUCH A CREEP?  you know why i cried?  i don't.  but the best i can figure out is that all year long, i've watched her try... and fail... and try... and fail.  and its not even that they are failures (if you can even call them that) - its that she tries SO DAMN HARD and goes SO DAMN DEEP into the darkness just to have it slip away for reasons beyond control.  its awe-inspiring.  its gut wrenching.  its incredible.  its raw.  and ive seen this in other athletes, but with her - its in the public eye and the triathlon world has watched her try and try all year long.  but here she was on the start line again, ready to give it another go, tough and fierce.  as i watched her and the amazingly talented women in our sport - i decided to be like them.

tough as fuck and fierce as hell.  

mental state now decided - i relaxed.  i kissed brian good luck - so FREAKING proud and happy to be towing the line with this human, this man that i couldn't be more in love with at this very moment.  i hoped that we would see each other often on the course and be able to lift each others spirits and use that as motivation at different points during the long day ahea---

seriously, what is happening to me.  find me my old sarcastic, self-deprecating self because prochnow-the-sap is scaring me.  WTAF.  this isn't why you came here, is it?  well friends, you are in for an interesting ride.  

the cannon sounded again and the crowd started to move forward.  brian was a couple people ahead and as he hit the water, i focused on myself.  beep... beep... beep... GO!  

SWIM:
i ran into the water and did a sad excuse of a dolphin belly flop.  i started swimming with a few hard, strong strokes, and i was on my way.  i felt good, smooth, and enjoyed the temp and feel of the water.  it wasn't crowded (the benefit of the rolling start) and i started passing people with each stroke.  i started to pick people to draft off of, but nothing was really panning out and i ended up swimming around them.  i counted buoys - there were 13 on the way out and 14 on the way back - and i zoned out.  someone started tapping my foot and i knew they were drafting off me.  which was fine - but i got angry each time they nailed my toes with their hands - so i kicked them hard a few times and tried to zig zag around but they were persistent.  

there was a lag around the turn buoy and i thought my drafter was gone, but lo and behold, the foot tapping started again through the second turn buoy.  i always breathe to my right and i was doing a pretty good job of sighting, but out of the corner of my left eye when i lifted my head, i recognized the familiar silver sleeved wetsuit with clear swedish goggles - it was Brian!  

also, the foot tapping had stopped, and i realized that it was probably him the whole time... and that thought made me laugh because i wasn't sure if i had actually nailed him during one of my kicks.  he pulled ahead and i knew it was my turn to draft off him.  it was definintely effective - i saw a girl creeping up on me to my right but after i got into the draft zone, she quickly fell behind and we started passing more people.  legal teamwork for the win!  this was great for a short while until i realized that bri was zigzagging all over the place and i decided to pull up along side him.  we swam mostly side by side until the finish and we ran out together, laughing about the swim and feeling giddy about our time, exactly 1 hour as we stood and ran out of the water.  we chatted and jogged to transition, stripping off the wetsuits and taking advantage of the wetsuit strippers.  into T1 we went, throwing out "i love yous" and "have a great days".

he always looks good.  i look like i just got caught in a rainstorm while sprinting for the bus.
thank you finisherpix.


swim: 1:01:01

T1: 
pink BASE socks on, Specialized cycling shoes, RudyWing57 helmet with visor and it was time to ride.  no dillydallying here!  i ran out to my bike as brian ran past with his bike.  i quickly grabbed Daisy from off the rack and headed to the mount line, just steps behind him.

T1:  6:45

BIKE: 
i got into a rhythm early with the goal of keeping brian in my sight for as long as possible.  we set out on montee ryan and i settled in for the 112 mile ride.  after a short bit, i decided to pass Brian and lay down a tiny bit of power - i knew this wouldn't last but i thought i'd let him chase me for awhile. montee ryan always seems so long, but 16ish minutes later, i was at the left hand turn for the highway.  after a short out and back with a u-turn, we set out for a long haul on the open road.

the highway is quite lovely.  its a closed course and the roads are smooth.  after a handful of miles, the male pros and female pros started to fly by on their way back to town.  i concentrated on racing smart and taking in calories and nutrition.  a pretty girl in a cool gray kit (from Mexico) passed me and i upped my power a bit more to keep up with her.  Brian passed me at some point on the way out and we exchanged hellos.  45 minutes into the highway ride, i was at the turn around, just a hair behind brian with a few people separating us.

there is an uphill portion on the way back that is deceivingly long and steeper than what it looks like (it certainly doesn't feel that fast coming down it on the way out).  i rode up alongside Bri as we slowly climbed the hill, trying to spin and keep heart rate in check - and at that moment a peloton of 20 or so men flew by.  i know women draft and cheat too - but this is so typical and was so blatantly obvious on the big open road.  not too long later, brian and i had separated and i was back to keeping an eye on his back and we passed the yellow penalty tent, now full of the drafting men.  this race (more than other IM races ive done) has a solid official moto presence on the bike course and routinely nails people for drafting and other violations.  i appreciate this.

ghetto screen shot - thank you finisherpix.


very quickly, it was back to montee ryan and the first trip up duplessis.  i could still see brian but he'd gotten a little further away because of the hills.  i kept my cadence high and spun around other people mashing the pedals and standing... they would pay for that later.

the climb is not that long and there are parts with downhill sections so its not a straight climb and very do-able.  i hit the u-turn at the top just behind brian and enjoyed the first descent down duplessis.  my bike handling skills were improving and i spent a lot of the downhill in aero, zoom zoom zooming around the more cautious athletes.

just after the bottom of the hills is the turn around and i pulled up a bit behind bri and yelled at him as we turned.  our split time at the half was roughly 2:45 and i was shocked but thrilled about making good time and setting up for a very solid (PR) bike split.  the music was up and the crowd was energized as we began lap 2.  i saw some familiar faces and waved, still feeling really good and pumped to be more than halfway through the longest leg of the day.  special needs was early on montee ryan and i stopped to replenish my stores.  i exchanged bottles and refilled honey stinger gummies and continued on, spending less than 1:30 in special needs.

shortly after the turnaround, thank you Jolene!


i had lost my rabbit/Brian so i rode "alone", continuing to pass athletes and keeping HR and power in the targeted range.  not too long later, i was back on the highway but something had changed.  the winds had set in, the temperature had increased and suddenly, biking wasn't as easy as it was the first time through.  still... i rode smart and didn't fight the wind and continued the constant intake of fluids and calories.  i started to slowly approach a pair of men - one who was riding very close to the man in front of him and would swing wide as if he was going to pass but then he seemed to change his mind and tucked back in behind the other man.  after his third time of doing this, i rolled my eyes.  pass the guy or drop back, but quit messing around and sitting on his wheel.  i was close enough now to pass the pair, and i did, without exerting a lot of effort.  i continued on without a thought, riding all the way on the right side of the lane.  all of a sudden the drafting clown pulled up - on my right - and passed on the right.  it startled me because he shouldn't have been there, and it made me swing left.  thankfully, no one was to my left.

all of a sudden, a moto came up and spoke to him, but i couldn't tell if he had been tagged with a penalty.  the moto slowed and as i passed them, i acknowledged the rule breaking cyclist in front of me and told them not only was he obviouly drafting but that he was passing on the right and riding erratically.  they thanked me and rode on, but slowly.  ive never called another athletes out on course to an official, but he was riding like an ass.  we don't need more bicycle accidents in this sport.  be an advocate for safe riding and we will all have safer, happier races.

*steps down from soapbox.*

after this series of events, it was back to the turn-around and i caught a glimpse of brian again just behind me (he had briefly stopped).  i was excited to see he was back and we were "together" again.  i figured our friends and families were probably getting a kick out of seeing us crossing the timing mats within seconds of each other and that made me smile.

it was time to go back up the long hill and descend fast and aero back to montee ryan.  i was mentally gearing up for duplessis and starting to get antsy to be done with the bike and onto the run.

duplessis part two was okay.  i knew i was getting a little tired, but i took controlled the climbing and didnt burn any matches on the incline.  i wasn't sure where brian was at that point but as soon as i rounded the u-turn, he was behind me - YES!  he passed me and i tried to stay with him, taking the descent smart but enjoying the free speed with a higher cadence to keep the legs rested but fresh and ready to start the run.

at the bottom, i hit the right hand turn and transition lay before me.  i pulled up next to brian at the dismount line and we giggled like children.  we were both thrilled with our bike splits and surprised that we had done the entire race together up until that point.  we handed off our bikes to the bike catchers (thank you!) and paused to take off our bike shoes for the long, but quicker run-sans-shoes around transition.

bike: 5:38:39

run bag collected, i headed into the change area.  i don't do a lot in there - just put on shoes and sunglasses and grab my visor, bib, and handheld and head out.  i met Bri exiting the change area and  paused for sunscreen as the sun was out and it was warm.  i started to run and looked back to see what he was doing and he waved me on because he wanted to get himself situated, throw out trash, etc.

T2: 3:31

RUN:
so, i took off.  i wasn't sure what kind of run he had in him with his back issuess and i knew he wouldn't want me to wait.  i actually knew he would get mad if i waited for him.  i didn't look back as i took the first left onto the road and into the first hill.  it was go time, FUN time, and i was on pace for a solid IM PR if i could pull together a respectable run.

i had legs but i was feeling more fatigued than i had off the bike in Ireland.  crazy how different it feels when you actually bike versus playing around a course in the rain for 6 plus hours.  i started off at sub-8 pace - way too fast - but the hills in the first few miles helped to slow me down and keep HR in check.  i think LL told me i was in 5th, but i may have dreamed that when i saw her on the first hill. 

straight out of transition, BYE.

the course is delightful - it is rolling until the paved trail and there it is an out and back to transition that you repeat all over again.  by the time i hit the trail for the first time, i had settled into a pace.  i was taking in fluids and ice at the aid stations, but thankfully it felt pretty shaded for most of the trail.  i kind of knew who was running ahead of my in the age group but i couldn't know for sure.  everytime a female passed me, i looked at the left leg.  the good news was that i was't passed by tons and the ones that did were either older or younger.  one of my goals was to not get lapped by the female pros but i ended up getting lapped by carrie lester and i "held off" the rest of the female pros, including sarah true.  but - this time the lead female passed me much closer to transition so i was ahead of the game from IMMT 2015 when mary beth ellis flew by me on the trail!

thank you finisherpix


i saw Bri on my way back into town and he was running but he had fallen a bit behind.  i felt relief in seeing him and my spirits lifted as it was then that my legs started to feel a little tight.  i enjoyed the net downhill back to town and waved at the Base tent as i went by.  a couple more ups and downs and then came a short, nasty steep up to the hotel (where special needs used to be, i believe) and a hard right and quick left.  i felt the cobblestones beneath my feet and saw the finish line ahead of me.  unfortunately, i had to take the right and do it all over again!

i ran through special needs without stopping (my bag contained a 5 hour energy drink, pepto, and a tablet of ondansetron in the event of GI upset that i luckily didn't need).  whenever i get to a halfway mark, i always picture myself running downhill - as if its just going to get easier from that momet on.  its never gotten easier, but that mindset helps me when my legs are fading.

special needs proof of life... guess im not getting that 5 hour energy drink back...


and they were definitely fading.  my pace had slowed, but i was maintaining.  i had gone out in 1:53 for the first half and i just told myself i only needed to run 2:06 to be under 4 hours.  the hills were tougher the second time through and as i approached the small village before the trail, i ran up on teske.  i could see his love shacker colors from aways out and he was holding a great pace.  my pace quickened in response.  we exchanged hellos and ran side by side for a short spell.  he looked so strong, but he laughed because it was his first lap.  he told me to "go get it girl" so i ran off.  i hit the trail for the last time and focused on passing people and tried to take my mind off the hurt.

hurt locker... with TWO FEET OFF THE GROUND.  thank you finisherpix.
also... new midriff kit fashion icon... AWESOME


i looked for dogs.  i did running math.  i read spectator signs.  i tried to smile (THIS IS SUPPOSED TO BE FUN).  and the miles passed.  or rather, the kilometer markers did and those came quicker than miles so it gave me benchmarks to pass.  i loved passing the single digits and then the teens, because they didn't apply to me and made me feel like i was so close to the end.  i saw Bri again and he was walking.  he was hurting but he was still in good spirits and i knew the finish line would again be his.

ironically, the last hour seemed to pass quickly.  i kept singing "one foot in front of the other" (i actually don't know any other words to that song so it was a quick repeat over and over) and i approached the water and the low bridges.  only a mile or so to go!  i passed the base tent for the final time and dragged myself up the steep hill to the hotel.  once on top, i took the final right turn and straightened my race belt and pulled down my kit that had turned into a midriff top.  i knew my parents were watching and didn't want to look as crazed as i looked in ireland!



the split in the cobbles came quickly.  i took my left, and took in the crowd; i high fived and i smiled big as the finishing arch got closer.  the downhill finish on the red carpet is amazing and its a finish unlike any other with the lights and people up on the balcony and in the stands.  i ran up and over the finish and threw my hands up in sweet, personal victory.

FINISH!  thank you caitlin for capturing this.


i didn't know my overall time but i knew i was under 11 and thankful that i could finally check that off my list.  its been way too many low 11's - 11:05, 11:06, 11:08, 11:11, 11:13 - consistent AF but quite the plateau.

run: 3:56:32

i made my way past the food to the morning clothes pick up and retrieved my crocs (shut up, they are the best post-race shoes) and my phone.  i opened IM tracker to check on Bri and then i looked at my stats and my ranking.

the best shoes.  i'll fight you on this.


overall: 10:46:28, 5th AG

3rd-5th were separated by 5 minutes and i knew i could retrieve those minutes somewhere next time.  but it wasn't time for "what ifs" or "next times".  it was time to fucking celebrate that 19 minute course and overall IM PR.  i called my parents and relived the day with them as i slowly wandered around.  i met up with LL, Matt, and Finn in the VIP area and had a glass of wine as i had the awesome opportunity to watch brian finish from the balcony.  i met the race director and thanked him profusely for organizing what continues to be my favorite ironman.

but there was no time to waste - i made my way through the building (an escape route i perfected last year while spectating) - in order to intercept brian in the tent.  we hugged, we took pictures, and then we sat for a bit and took in the aftermath of what we had just done.  we shared our different perspectives from the day and i reveled in being able to share this with my person.

---

awards took place the following morning.  we were moving painfully slow, as expected, and met LL and Matt and Finn for - you guessed it - starbucks and more crepes.  we headed toward the tent for awards and kona allocation/roll down and grabbed a couple of seats near the stage.  as i waited for my turn to go on stage, brian caught a glimpse of talbox cox and lionel and i joked that he should go talk to talbox.  brian then nudged my arm and pointed toward the table in front of us.






sarah true was leaning over and filling out kona paperwork a few feet away.  i looked at bri and he shook his head - he couldn't believe i hadn't noticed her literally standing feet away.  after much debate, i decided to be *that girl* and talk to her.  i congratulated her on her kona slot (YAY!) and we talked about the day and I told her about ireland.  we laughed over how crazy it was over there and brian took our picture.  i was giddy.



that was the icing on the cake for my magic weekend.  i knew kona would be a long shot - suprise, no roll down - but i got to meet one of my idols and that was enough.  more than enough.  i love this sport.  i love how personal it is and how much we learn about ourselves and how far we can push ourselves - and each other.

---

thank you to brian - for being there day in, day out.  for being my training partner and real-life partner.  im so thankful to do this life with you.

thank you to my family.  your endless support and belief that i can do anything is unaparalleled.  the older i get, the more grateful i am to have had the upbringing that i had - you raised me to be a strong woman with big dreams.

thank you Drew and Crew racing - it takes trust in a coach and trust in the process to succeed.  you gave me the tools to lay the foundation and continue to provide the bricks to build me into a better athlete than i was the day before.

thank you friends - both in sport and out - you inspire me.  you make me laugh, you make me happy cry. you care, and that is more than enough.

thank you to my teams, DC tri club elite - for your continued support and believing in me through the ups and downs the past few years and BASE performance - for being an amazing presence and forging meaningful friendshps.  Thank you honey stinger, xterra, osmo, rudy project, louis garneau, district taco, xx2i, zealios, boco gear - awesome sponsors and super lucky to represent you.

and finally, thank you sarah true for lifting me up this year and for showing us that showing up everyday and working your ass off pays off.  that it pays to dig deep and when you feel like you can't any more - dig deeper.

and that you need to be a fucking force of nature.

---

with that, the bulk of the season is over.  i raced a 70.3 "for fun" a few weeks after IMMT but it wasn't one for the record books.  its time to embrace the "off season" with unstructured workouts (i.e. zwifting and listening to crime junkie on long runs) and lots of pumpkin spiced goodies.  and bloody marys. all the bloody marys.

thanks for joining me, negative 3 readers - a sincere thank you if you are still reading this - im grateful for you.  lets go play bikes or do monument runs (its been too long since i did a phallic run around the mall...)!

next up... IM St. George and IMMT (AGAIN!)

Wednesday, September 25, 2019

Race Recap: Ironman Ireland - and some overly dramatic thoughts on racing in tough conditions

EDIT: I TRIED SEVEN TIMES TO CHANGE THE FONT SIZE... 

negative three followers - I'm writing a race report only 3 months after completing a race - WHO. IS. PROUD. OF. ME?  

anyway... sláinte!

that's basically "cheers" in gaelic, specifically "good health".  we said it many times over the course of the trip and we had so many reasons to say "cheers" and "cheers to good health" - lots of reasons to celebrate and be thankful for the time we spent on the big green island. 

first of all, i have to say - i was so lucky to be part of the inaugural Ironman Ireland, Cork.  i was also ignorant lucky that i did virtually no research into the course prior to signing up and in the time leading up to the race.  fortunately, holli provided updates regarding the bike course and the now famous windmill hill, but lets be honest - i had zero idea about what i was getting myself into.  coincidentally, my mom (henceforth known as momma p) celebrated the 39th anniversary of her 21st birthday this past year and i decided to give her a trip to ireland.  i've never given anyone a gift this big before and no one deserves it more.  my mom loves to see and visit new places and i knew she would love to visit ireland - in exchange, i wanted her to sherpa the race (she's a pro at this point).  

after many months of planning, reading travel blogs, googling "best things to see and do in ireland", and writing itineraries for travel in pretty new notebooks with pretty new pens, it was finally time for us to leave.  the training was done, i was finally feeling strong running and biking and i was excited to see what my body could do with this unknown course.  my legs had finally stopped hurting all the time (still not sure what the problem was) with the help of stretching, normatec boots, consistent recovery smoothies, etc.  my swimming was eh - its been a struggle to find the motivation to get in the pool this year but i knew i could muscle through the swim.

B dropped me off at the airport after a stop at southblock for acai bowls for pre-flight fueling.  my flight was delayed by 40 minutes but otherwise no issues.  for the first time ever, i was NOT able to sleep on the plane and instead enjoyed the plethora of films that aer lingus had to offer.  i enjoyed the double meals on the flight including a tiny lemon cheesecake that was so delightful, it would follow me into my dreams.  

we landed at 5:30 am ireland time (11:30 pm our time) and i was exhausted.  i found my gigantically heavy bag and attempted to locate my bicycle.  in retrospect, i should not have chosen the gigantically heavy bag WITHOUT WHEELS... oh well.  i wandered around for awhile looking for momma p in the nearly empty baggage claim and finally i spotted a women holding an orange sign (i wasn't wearing glasses) and i assumed it was my mom so i ran to her.  she had made a fantastic birthday sign (oh yea, it was now my 35th birthday in ireland time - i had forgotten) and an ironman sign on the flip side!  we were here and together and it was time to start our adventure!


it even had a DINOSAUR.


this involved picking up the rental car and dropping a paycheck on rental insurance.  after choking back vomit on the pricetag, we trudged toward Hertz with our bags and bike bag in tow and located our audi station wagon.  we were originally supposed to get an SUV of sorts but the audi proved to be an excellent vehicle.  i am now a rental car snob and will refuse to drive anything less than a beautiful audi from here on out.  the man divvying up rental cars gave us clueless americans zero guidance in how to operate the vehicle.  i cursed his name this was much appreciated when i attempted to drive on the opposite side of the road in a vehicle that was a mirror image of cars back home.

we loaded up the car (plenty of room for all our things) and set out on the open roads just outside of downtown dublin.  

in morning rush hour.  

with no sleep.  

driving on the opposite side of the road.  in the opposite side of the car.
friends - it.  was.  stressful.  it was white knuckling, straining to see (SHUT UP, I WORE MY GLASSES), playing follow the leader with the car in front of me, and trying to process how to make a right hand turn.  the time finally came when i was at the front of the line at the light.  

it was go time.  

i would have to conciously make the decision - WHICH LANE TO TURN INTO.  some wire tripped in my brain and short circuited and there might have been screaming but i remember little else until we made the executive decision to find coffee immediately (mom gets me) and arrived at a parking garage in the middle of dublin.

i turned in, realized it was going to be 30 euro to park there and immediately attempted to leave while driving in reverse on the opposite side of the road.  then, a car pulled up behind me and i lost my mind and wanted to cry.  mom then discovered we could park hourly for 4 euro (at that point i was ready to pay the 30 euro just to stop driving) so i went right back up to where i started and discovered the parking spots are half the size of the spots in the US. 

i pulled in, turned off the car, and nearly passed out.  we laughed instead.  "WE SURVIVED!" we exclaimed.  we got out of the car and tried to lock it and it wouldn't lock.  for reference, i drive a 2011 nissan rogue that i love - its the lowest, most basic version of this vehicle - i dont need those bells and whistles yo!

however, because my mom does drive a fancy car (in fact, the fanciest version of the same rogue I drive), she recognized the car was still running and that i had to push a button to turn off the car.  

excuse me, what?  whatever happened to those good old fashioned keys that turn on the car?  

we walked out into the narrow, winding streets of dublin and had no concept of where we were.  we only knew that it said "cafe" on the building outside and we stumbled in, in serious need of provisions.  i had scrambled eggs and coffee and i was rejuvenated.  i could drive on the opposite side of the road on no sleep in morning traffic!  BRING IT ON IRELAND!  I CAN DO ANYTHING!

we decided to head out of dublin as we would be back at the end of the trip.  we headed in the direction of county cork where the race would be held so that we could meet up with holli, get checked in for the race, and do a little shake-out run.  the town of waterford was on the way and we wanted to check out the waterford factory and all the beautiful crystal.  i also wanted to try blaa bread (native to waterford) because, carbs.  





once out on the open roads, i was feeling better about driving.  we parked in waterford along the water and booked a spot in the tour of the factory.  it was AWESOME.  i highly recommend the tour.  the craftsmanship was astounding and incredible - im so glad we made the decision to visit.  we had our first true irish meal of the day for lunch - irish brown soda bread, seafood chowder with chips, and some sort of shredded beef on blaa bread.  it was delicious.  truthfully, blaa bread wasn't life changing but i officially checked it off my ireland bucket list.  because, yes, my bucket list included eating bread.  

we eventually made our way to youghal (pronounced y'all) and located the airbnb.  as we were walking in, an adorable boy was in the yard near where we parked.  we chatted with him and his mom and discovered that their names were norma and john.  john was SO excited for the race on sunday and he had already met holli and judith and he knew all about us.   immediately, i felt like a pro athlete the way that they were talking to us.  i got all the warm and fuzzies and was so excited to get settled into our temporary new life in southern ireland.


this is john.  john is the best.  everyone needs a little guy like this at some point in their life.


pre-run, twins

holli and i set out for a quick 30 min shake-out run.  she took me past the ironman village and through the town.  it was like out of a movie.  the narrow roads, the local shops, the clock tower - it was everything i had been picturing in my head for the past year.  we picked up the moms back at the house and went to the village to check in.  it was the most laid back check in process ever.   and all the blue and yellow forms where ironman makes you sign your life away were electronic - so easy!  the interesting part was that special needs bags were pre-assigned - you had to register for them ahead of time which i have never seen before.  we were prepared and picked up our bags for a total of 5 gear bags, as normal.


modeling kits, twins

brag for the rest of your life, twiins

The mommas were the real heroes of the trip - #1 sherpa mommas

friday morning, we "slept in" and headed to the beach to get in a swim.  momma p joined us as the designated talbot cox of the trip and we headed to swim start along the boardwalk.  this walkway would later become the initial part of the run on race day.  there was a smattering of people in the water.  the waves were pretty calm and the water looked beautiful.  holli had already warned me that the water was fairly frigid so in addition my xterra pretty purple wetsuit, i added neoprene booties and a neoprene cap to wear under my normal swim cap.  


walking to the swim - also the first part of the run course boardwalk

legitimately not emotionally prepared for the cold water

me: holli, its FREAKING cold, this is crazy, my feet are frozen.
holli: dude... you're not even in the water yet.

me: oh hell, WAIT FOR ME.

this was one of the best decisions ive ever made in my life. 

we waded into the water, feeling that initial shock of the cold water.  in typical holli fashion, she got right into swimming.  holli does life at 100%.  me... eh not so much.  being the temperature princess that i am - i allowed a minute or two to get used to the temperature, but lets be honest, your body doesn't adjust to this level of cold - it just proceeds to go numb.  face in the water, i set off after holli.  i could swim but i was highly uncomfortable.  at least the waters were relatively calm and i could easily sight the yellow buoys in front of me.  after what felt like a mile, i looked at my watch.  it had been 2 minutes and 13 seconds since i had started my watch.  oh hell.

i finally got to the buoy about 5-6 minutes later and turned around to head home.  my face was numb and exhaling felt odd since my lips were frozen in place.  i was swimming and it was doable but i knew i was going to be nearly frigid getting onto the bike race morning following 2.4 miles in these waters.

our plan was to immediately get on the bikes and head out for 45-60 minutes but we cozied up to the fire the mommas had started in the fireplace and warmed the feet for over an hour before finally getting on the bikes.  while we warmed up, the mommas gifted us with signed copies of Mike Reilly's book - Finding My Voice - which was awesome!  such a cool and thoughtful surprise.  thank you Mommas!


matchy matchy Rudy helmets + "pretty okay at bikes" socks

we headed out on the bikes and tackled the infamous windmill hill first.  it is the 21% quarter-ish mile hill that everyone had been talking about for months.  it was steep but i had thrown an 11-32 on there (actually i definitely did not do that - Brian did) and i was so thankful for the added gear.  it wasn't impossible, but i knew the second time up the hill on race day would be somewhat painful!  we then headed out to the beginning of the course - the first 20-30 minutes of the bike were relatively flat (we just did an out and back) but i knew it wouldn't stay this way.  we got a little taste of the uneven pavement and potholes, but nothing too significant.  the roads were noticeably narrower than in the states and quite technical.  by that point - still 2 days out from the race - there were already signs cheering on the ironman athletes and old bikes displayed as decorations.  it was amazing, i've never seen anything like it on a course.  if this were back in the states - the residents would likely be furious about the massive road closures for the closed IM bike course.  but here... they were excited and the excitement was palpable and that was incredible to experience as an athlete.


by the time we arrived home, the mommas had already set out to explore, so we met them in town, shopped, and ate our way around the village. athletes were everywhere and the excitement continued to build - you could feel it in the air.  we attempted a grocery store trip to get food and find disposable water bottles for the race hydration - but that proved to be quite difficult.  we finally found some fat water bottles that we could jam into the bottle cages and it was mostly okay.  i also had an encounter with the company that made the lemon cheesecake that i had been dreaming about - so we bought an entire lemon cheesecake, irish butter, and yogurt to go with our post-race champagne that our airbnb hosts had gifted us.  
(later, when race day got hard, it would be thoughts of this cheesecake that would get me through the dark points.  legit.)


must hug viszla baby... puppy kisses... pure bliss.

welcome banquet, sitting next to Mike Reilly

saturday - bike and gear check in day!  we woke up and had the customary big breakfast of pancakes (premade! how delightfully easy!), eggs, sausage, and toast.  we put our gear bags together and made sure our bikes were prepped for sunday and holli and i and the mommas headed over with all our gear.  per the rules - we had to wear our bibs and our helmets for bike check.  looking superfly with our normal clothes and helmet/visor and race bib number, we checked in the bikes and dropped off our transition bags.  we did a leisurely walk back to our place but not without stopping for a bowl of fresh mini donuts - they were delicious.

the coolest.


the rest of the day is kind of a blur - we packed special needs bags and the mommas made food for dinner.  we read a little, and finally it was time for bed and time to dream some Ironman dreams before the big day.  there was an update online that the swim would be shortened the following day and i wondered how my day would go with my strongest leg getting altered...

Race morning:

got up at 3:45 after a surprisingly good nights sleep.  we made sure we had our bottles and nutrition and packed up our gear and walked to transition.  it was drizzling but not too bad.  looking at the water though... i knew in my gut we would not be be swimming and frankly, as a swimmer - I WAS THRILLED.  the waves were large and treacherous looking and i already knew how chilly the water was going to be.  a part of me also knew that if they did have us swim, people were going to suffer greatly and possibly die.  that is absolutely not an exaggeration. 

i checked on miss daisy and loaded up my bottles and nutrition, and filled my tires, already feeling a bit of the chill despite dressing warmly.  it was an odd transition vibe - the music wasn't pumping like it usually is, i couldn't hear mike reilly or anyone on the microphones giving their minute by minute updates and mini pep-talks.  it was strangely quiet other than the buzz of athletes chatting, the whirring of expensive wheels, bicycle floor pumps - but it was still an ironman morning though the unwelcome sick-to-my-stomach feeling was wonderfully absent. 

holli and i met up with the mommas and so began the long wait.  we waited... and waited... and the 6 am announcement regarding the swim came and went... and we continued to wait.  around 6:30, via what seemed like purely word of mouth - we learned that yes, the swim was cancelled and that we were to wait by our bikes at 7:20 and we would be escorted row by row into the tent to retrieve our T1 bags and get suited up for the bike. 
once in the tent, it was a pure clusterfuck.  my bag was adjacent to the pro rack and a volunteer stopped us from proceeding further because at that moment, the pros were getting dressed and had to get out of the tent since they would be starting before us.  i turned around to assess the state of the rest of the tent and bumped my butt into the butt of the person behind me.  Anja Ippach was bending over and putting her things into her bike bag.  i had touched greatness and hoped it would bring me luck, ha!  i looked over at linsey corbin (squeeeeeeeeeee) and assessed what she was wearing and decided to follow her lead of jersey, arm warmers, and vest.  i had my sleeveless top on underneath the jersey for an added layer.  i added a neck gaitor and woefully forgot my neoprene shoe covers, but remembered the latex gloves and wore those under a thick pair of full fingered cycling gloves. 

it was then that my first flash of stupidity hit me.  i had been toting around a backpack all morning (which contained my empty plastic morning clothes bag among other things) and panicked when i realized i wouldn't be able to hand it to my mom as the pros had started and the spectators were now on the other side of a gate.  i squeezed back inside the tent (ILLEGALLY since they'd kicked us out to let more people in) and stuffed my backpack into my T1 bag, proceeding to rip it apart in the process.  i carefully hung it back up, prayed that it would hold together for the next 12+ hours until i retrieved it, and headed toward my bike, completely overlooking the fact that i had my empty morning clothes bag that i could easily have stowed my backpack in.  dumb.  

i grabbed my bike and joined the growing line of athletes waiting to begin the time trial start.  it was raining and i was shivering significantly and standing still in the cold was not helping.  >30 minutes after waiting in line, i finally started.  

BIKE:

i tried not to go out too hard and just settle into the pace, slowing bringing my heartrate up to where i wanted it.  it was an odd change since normally my HR is sky high following T1.  it was raining a fair amount and the roads were narrow in spots.  i didn't know how hard to really push so i kept my eye on the power and kept it as steady as i could.  

i recognized areas of the bike course from our adventure bike preview a couple of days before.  i passed a lot of people, a lot of men passed me but not many (if any) females.  i focused on taking in enough nutrition which was a challenge given the rain and being cold - its so hard to make yourself drink in those conditions!  there were rolling portions of the course but any descent was hairy with standing water and hidden potholes.  i started to get colder and colder but the latex gloves were actually helping - highly recommend!  

before i knew it, there were less than 10 miles to go in the first loop.  i wasn't going particularly fast, but i wasn't getting passed by tons of women, so i wasn't too concerned. i headed down a pretty steep descent and in the distance, i saw someone on the left side of the road waving - it took a second to register that it was holli!  i veered to the left (thankfully i was already pretty far over the left since we were riding on the left side) and hopped off the bike.  i saw a shredded tube in the grass and asked holli what had happened.  she had a flat after hitting something in the descent and the replacement tube had subsequently exploded and the CO2 cartidge was blown.  a mechanic/official was on the right side of the road waiting.  i handed my spare tube to holli, then realizing i had lost 2 CO2 cartidges because of the bumpy roads and the lid of my QR box had flown off at some point in the previous 48 miles - thats how uneven the roads were.  had i been the one with the flat - i would have had nothing to blow up the tube with!  i asked holli if she wanted me to stay and she said "its your race friend." i said "fuck it, this day already sucks, i'll hang out with you until we make sure you're good to go."  i was already in pure survival mode and wasn't having any fun so hanging out with my friend seemed like a nice break from a really shitty morning.  

the mechanic/official ended up manually pumping up the tire with a hand pump and in the process, holli and i dislodged the motorcycle storage box from the back of the bike.  whoops.  we reattached it, holli got her wheel back on and away we went!  there were a couple of ass kicking climbs that i hadn't really noticed during our course preview but i kept holli in my sight and slow grinded my way through them and made my way back to town.  windmill hill was next and it was a page straight out of challenge roth or TDF - lined 2-3 deep with spectators, cowbells, signs, etc - very very cool!  definitely a needed boost to get you up the hill and i made it up without too much of a struggle.  from there, its all downhill to start the second looop and it was directly past our airBNB.  i waved "hi" to my momma in her yellow raincoat and sped away - so happy to see her!  

special needs was next and the cold was really starting to hit me.  brain fog was setting in from being so cold and as i rooted through my bag, i grabbed my bottles AND LEFT ALL MY NUTRITION BEHIND.  i rode away without giving it a second thought.  i was visibly shivering by then and i was worried about the next few hours on two wheels, knowing exactly what lie ahead on the course.  i put my head down and just focused on pedal strokes, power, heart rate - trying to think about anything else except the cold and my shaking.  i had nutrition in my bottles, but its never enough and i always eat real food as well.  mid-way through the loop, i started to have tunnel vision and my peripheral vision was hazy and going black.  i realized that my left hand was frozen to the point that i thought i was braking when i wasnt - thank goodness i still had feeling in my right hand to control the rear brake.  a little bit before the next aid station, i realized that i was seriously bonking from the lack of food.  thankfully, there was an aid station close by and i hopped off my bike and grabbed some food.  i stood there for a few minutes, debating about asking a volunteer for a phone to call brian or my mom.  i didn't want to continue, i wanted to quit so bad because it was so damn miserable to be out there with still 20 miles to go.  i drank and ate a little more and decided to get back on my bike.  i soft pedaled all the way back to town, my power and heart rate ridiculously low that i wasn't even looking at the numbers at that point - i just wanted to keep the rubber side down and keep moving forward.  i ended up peeing on the bike numerous times - i hate doing it but i was soaking wet and its just gotta happen - and i consciously did it the first few times.  maybe its gross - but the warmth was actually welcoming.  the next few times however, i had zero control over my bladder and was surprised when i realized what was happening.  that was the depth of the cold and brain fog i was feeling.  


windmill hill

finally - FINALLY - it was time for windmill hill again.  since i had barely been putting effort into pedaling, my legs didn't feel trashed so i pulled my wits together to get up the hill.  this time, people were struggling much more - lots of wide swerving or abruptly stopping and getting off the bike - both of which happened right in front of me and i had to swerve fast - twice - to avoid a collision and avoid having to get off my own bike.  i made it to the top for the second time and headed back to transition - ready to turn in my timing chip, see my mom, and take a warm shower.  i was done.  

i rode to the dismount line, got off my bike, and slowly walked it to the bike rack.  i didn't run as i always do - i couldn't even keep the bike in a straight line because my hands were both non-functional at this point.  it was dark and cloudy and it was still pouring rain.

T2/Run: 

i ambled into the change tent, grabbed my bag... and sat.  after a minute, i made an attempt to take off my shoes but i couldn't.  my fingers were actually not working - it was like trying to type on a keyboard with limp noodles for fingers.  i tried to unzip my vest and get the cold, wet clothes off - same issue.  there were no volunteers as there are at north american races.  had there been volunteers, i would have been able to get through T2, but there was no one.  after 10 minutes near a heater, i finally felt the tingle and feeling started to come back.  i was able to take off my top wet layers (i kept my tri shorts and sleeveless trip top on) and added a long sleeved pullover and my cycling jacket.  i changed into dry socks and put on running shoes, and found handwarmers at the bottom of my bag that i stuffed into my cheap 1 dollar mittens.  i donned a beanie, added a visor and i was ready to find my mom.  i dressed warmly not with the intention of running, but with the intention of finding my mom and going home.  the initial run course started on the boardwalk along the beach with a pretty intense headwind that nearly blew my visor off.  head down, i literally gritted my teeth and groaned/moaned out loud at the wind - like, for the love of christ, the weather was just continuing to get more and more miserable.  
5-6 minutes later, i saw my mom near the top of the one hill on the run course.  as soon as i saw her, i broke down crying.  "its okay to stop" my mom said.  i told her that holli had a flat (they already knew) and i told her how miserable and scary the bike had been.  "i think im going to stop" i told mom.  she said "thats fine... but you're in second place by 8 minutes."

...
...

"um.  okay.  i guess... bye!"  i said as i started to run away.  i stopped crying and knew there was some work to be done.  a switch had been flipped inside of me.  i went from sobbing and nearly quitting to having hope dangled in front of my face.  as i ran away, that was a pretty large pill to swallow - i didn't have the mindset to run - i was supposed to be on my way back to the airBNB to a nice, HOT SHOWER, not preparing for another 4 hours of exercising in the rain.  i was also highly overdressed.  

i channeled my friends who had raced louisville last year.  i channeled my friends who had raced Boston last year.  they had done it - and survived - and hell, i could too.  "i can be a badass", i told myself.  i then followed that up with "hell, I AM a fucking badass."  i then started hearing the ironman commentator from the NBC Kona specials talking about Me.  i could hear him talking about the lack of swimming being detrimental to my race, my struggle in the bike, my lack of nutrition, stopping to help holli, and putting all of that into the best run of my life.  he would say, "passes like these are almost always permanent" among his other quotes that I've heard over and over again in the kona specials and those thoughts actually made me giggle out loud.  i was headed straight to crazy town.  

the run involved 4 out and backs - i started out WAY too fast at a sub 8 pace on the way out to the first turn around and kept trying to slow the pace.  it inevitably would creep down and i'd have to make myself slow jog a few steps to relax.  i was feeling pretty good and loose, no big aches and pains so i was happy with that.  halfway through the first loop on the way back, i realized i was overheating.  i was sweating and then getting really clammy and started to feel a little dizzy.  i stopped at an aid station and frantically tried to rip off my cycling jacket to take off my long sleeved pullover.  a really kind older gentleman helped me take off the wet clothes and i chucked the long sleeved shirt into the trash.  my hands felt pretty warm between the gloves and the handwarmers but i couldn't get the damn zipper to zip.  the volunteer tried as well and finally, i said screw it, thanked him, and ran away, my jacket flapping behind me like a sail... as it would continue to flap for the next 21 miles looking like a damn fool.  

it continued to rain on the run but the frigid cold i had felt on the bike was gone.  i was still cold and i was still unhappy but i wasn't so miserable that i couldn't keep moving forward.  i was holding a decent pace and with each passing minute, i was doing a lot of mental running math to see if i could finally break the 4 hour barrier again.  it kept my brain occupied.  i looked forward to seeing my mom and getting updates on placing - at some point she said i was in third (i wasn't, but because of the time trial start, people were hitting checkpoints at different times) and said i was gaining on first place.  eventually i ran my way within four minutes of the leader but i was running out of steam and my quads were getting tight.  i also looked forward to seeing holli and she was looking so, so strong.  

mike reilly and the female announcer (Joanna, i think?) were calling people across the finish line and during one of my passes by the finishers arch, she said "we've got a runner wearing wooly mitterns!" yep, that was me!  and i was definitely not the only runner in "woolies" but maybe the only one with hot pink mittens that looked like a crazy person with an unzipped cape jacket streaming behind her.  

i received my last colored bracelet at the final turnaround at transition and it was time to run my way to the finish.  the headwind on the boardwalk had really picked up (oh sweet jesus) but i was at 3:45 or so into the run and i knew that sub-4 was mine, even if i chose to walk.  head down, i ran into the wind and up the hill for the final time.  the red carpet lie ahead and i smiled big and high fived people with my wooly mittens and crossed the line.  i saw the mommas and headed to them, medal and various liquids and drinks in hand along with a silver space blanket.  

thank jesus the day was over.  i finished 2nd and that in itself was a true accomplishment given the events of the day.  i was proud of myself for changing my mental game on the fly at the beginning of the run, for not giving up on the bike course, for stopping to give my dear friend a spare tube so she could complete the race that we spent a year looking forward to, and for putting ironman number 8 in my personal mental record book.  

i called brian and relived the day to him while searching for holli.  there was a serious lack of chicken broth everywhere so i sipped hot chocolate as i wandered.  finally, she appeared, we took some pictures and we headed home... slowly... the post ironman legs were setting in and i was thoroughly chilled to the bone.  a hot shower has NEVER felt so delightful.  

we drove back to transition a little bit later and retrieved our bikes and gear and ended up attempting to find dinner at 11 pm at our local favorite restaurant.  sandwiches and victory stout beer was had and we happily headed home to sleep.  

awards were nice the next day, top 3 were awarded.  we did the now customary wait for kona roll down and as per usual in the races that i attend, it did not roll down.  2nd AG and no KQ since I am a female racing ironmans and not a man.  i get that it is proportionally allotted, but it still sucks.  and it sucked to look at the final results and see that i had a faster bike and run than the first place girl by >17 minutes, but it was my 22 min frozen transition that stood between me and the KQ.  

i let myself be sad for a little bit, and we ended up in cork, ireland at the titanic museum later that day which was really fun.  the sting of the lack of KQ and my final results continued to rear up a few times a day... for weeks... (and every so often even now writing this a few months later)... but i had another ironman to look forward to and boy, was that a magic day... 

until next time my friends and negative three followers... thank you for following along this crazy crazy ramble of mine.  stay awesome!